sleepyzenith

no matter how hard I try or how "smart" I may be it will never meet any aspirations or expectations, i'll never be happy, and i'll never succeed

it doesn’t matter how much motivation or advice I get (most im already aware of) or how much time I spend to myself and actually attempt to be happy nothing will ever change, all im gonna do is sit and complain and see all my friends be happy and live happy lives while im stuck in a mess of depression anxiety and self hatred

nothing will ever change from people they will continue to say bad things behind me and be way too shallow for me to even consider saying all this. they’ll also never stop talking about themselves and be completely aloof to the fact that the person they’re talking to is not a robot and has a life. and if somehow, somehow, the other person gets a chance to talk, it’s never anything meaningful - just more boasting and “I did this I did that”

https://lichess.org/@/Zenith00